Forget Ohio: Jerry Springer needs to get his ass back to California if he ever wants to run for office. At the very least, he would've been a great moderator for Wednesday night's debate for the California goobernatorial recall election. (Here's a debate post-mortem, care of the Washington Post.) Thankfully, I live in New York right now and do not have to sully myself with deciding between Arnold, Arianna, Cruz, Tom, The Old Gray Lady, the porn star and Arnold Jackson.

I guess it would be kind of entertaining to have a has-been action star for Governor… probably a better choice than anyone else. But the truth is, Mr. Al, it doesn't matter who is in charge of the state, because the voters have Propositioned and Initiative'd it into paralysis. Meanwhile, developers have turned every non-coastal city into an asphalt craphole crawling with big-box stores and auto malls, coated with a nice blanket of brown air. And this all happened long before Gray Davis and his blow-dryer showed up on the Capitol steps.

California isn't the only state that's broke -- nearly every state is in the hole. The federal government is even worse shape (but thankfully, they have credit cards). So why is California the only state with the brass ones to try recalling their governor? You're all high on medicinal marijuana. That's why.

So, while you're cleaning up the bong water, read this primer on the real downfall of California: Proposition 13.