My Fresyes mug arrived today from the Fresyes store. Merry Chrismakah to me. Just in time to celebrate the holidays with a cup of hot cocoa, while taking shelter from the frigid air and rabid snow-eating children.

Over at the Onion, they really captured the Christmas spirit in Iraq, where American service men and women are spreading joy and goodwill as always with their machine guns and hum-vees. (Scary. That picture looked a little like Brooklyn for a minute).

Speaking of Iraq. I know some of you Fresyesians probably like that we're liberating the Iraqis from the tyranny of evildoers and that ugly Saddam. I don't want to ruin your holidays. But no matter that we caught the dirty old bastard in his home sweet hole, George Bush is still a dope. Did anyone see him being interviewed by Diane Sawyer this week? If you weren't busy watching Paris and Nicole let teenage boys lick their butts, you saw for yourself that the guy can't speak in complete sentences. Gibberish I tell you; and he's our president.

Anyhow. Happy holidays to each and every one of you from icy Ct. Have a good laugh with this one.

IT'S SNOWING!!! New York is covered in the white stuff — and no, we do not mean cocaine. It's the first winter snow of the year, and it always seems to magically put a silencer on the street noise. Meanwhile, the New York Times uses the occasion to show off the latest in utilitarian winter fashion... children. They can protect your head AND eat the snow before it hits you!

My plan is to start making snow angels on Avenue B as some sort of guerrilla street-art project, but... naw, screw it. I'll just watch TV.

While you're locked inside today drinking hot rum cider, here's a fun trick: Go to Google, type in "miserable failure" and press the "I'm feeling lucky" button. (Thanks to Andy.)

I've enjoyed seeing the mounds of money my boys are making by selling t-shirts and dust bunnies on ebay these days. I myself haven't sold anything on ebay just yet...haven't found anything shiny I want to part with. Meanwhile, I found this when I was looking for a tea kettle for my wierd, chamomile-drinking boyfriend. HA!

This will be the last time I ever mention Song Airlines -- but, like any other cult, raising awareness is crucial in these early stages. And the problem is worse than first imagined. When I first flew the airline, I thought my flight was simply ruined by some chatty, over-caffeinated flight attendants. But guess what?!? It turns out these mile-high jokesters were actually following a script. This New York Times reporter also got an earful:

"En route from New York to Fort Lauderdale, the 'scripting' takes the form of a kind of holiday-package, ambivalence-is-not-an-option, forced gaiety. In her initial remarks to the passengers before boarding, the gate agent uses the phrase 'bright and cheerful' three times. 'We want you to know we like our jobs,' she adds over the intercom. 'We're happy to be here. So challenge us!'

"We board a plane 'made in the good old U.S.A.,' and before we taxi to the runway, a gate agent named Andrew leads the plane in a German beer-drinking song in honor of Oktoberfest. No time to dwell on the anxiety provoked by hearing on-duty airline personnel singing a drinking song; as the plane leaves the gate, we're enjoined by a flight attendant to 'sit back, relax and enjoy our Song.'"

The American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers, ASCAP (or "ass cap," whichever you prefer), which collects royalty payments for copyright holders and represents them in legal disputes is going after pub owners who don't pay up when their musical acts play cover songs.

Do they really think Led Zep needs to get paid when a pimple-faced garage band plays a crappy version of Dazed and Confused? This could spell the end of mediocre musical acts everywhere.

Holy jesus, this just sealed it for me: The Darkness is no joke. For more insane proof, dig the band's live cover of Radiohead's "Street Spirit." (Thank you, largehearted boy.)

Even if you don't follow San Francisco's mayoral politics this is entertaining. Dress the candidates in drag.