Remember those episodes of "Happy Days" when the Fonz had to do the unthinkable and admit he was actually wrong -- and then it took a good 10 minutes for the word "sorry" to slide out of his mouth? Well, let's just say I'm expecting President Bush to strap on a leather jacket and some waterskis and throw us a big "Aaaaayyyyyy" tomorrow, because that little weasel FINALLY said the "s" word today for those who were subjected to horrendous abuse in Iraqi prisons -- something the higher-ups have actually known about for months now:

A day after he stopped short of apologizing, Bush told Jordan's King Abdullah II: "I was sorry for the humiliation suffered by the Iraqi prisoners and the humiliation suffered by their families.

"I told him I was as equally sorry that people seeing those pictures didn't understand the true nature and heart of America," Bush said, standing in the Rose Garden alongside Abdullah.

Let's move on...

1. Coolfer tells us that Lollapalooza is coming to New York on a Tuesday and Wednesday, which has gotta be the most retahhhhded idea ever imagined. (Not that I want to brave the dustbowl that is Randall's Island, anyway.) In much better shape is the 'No, where you've got Dave F***ing Chappelle, Simon & Garfunkel and the Crusty Demons Global Assault Tour all on their way. This, right after Pretty Girls Make Graves and Seachange just trotted into town.

Call me mainstream trash, but I've already purchased tix for Van Hagar and the Ben Folds/Rufus/Guster triple threat at Central Park Summerstage. Bring it.

2. "What makes an assassin, Lt. Drebin?" Give it up for Ricardo Montalban, who is opening his own theater. As my co-worker noted: "All the seats will be made of fine Corinthian leather."