1. Welcome to the O.Z., bitch! Fresno Bee columnist Mike "Oz" Osegueda stakes his journalistic integrity on our half-assed reporting here at Fresyes … and we love him for it! His pop-culture column for McClatchy's Finest is a must-read and a good sign that the Bee is finally trying to court readers under the age of 85 -- a demographic newspaper executives are hearing more and more about in the San Joaquin Valley these days. As long as they don't get rid of Family Circus, everything will be just fine -- and we'll keep kissing ass until they give us a writeup in the Faith & Values section. 2. You know a blog is truly brilliant when it gets a write-up in the New York Post in its first week. Breakup News is a comprehensive listing of ugly splits, written in the for-the-record style of The New York Times' own Women's Sports Page. Here's the Rosado/Kaysen announcement: "Ronda Kaysen, 27, would like to reiterate that she and Daryl Rosado, 42, remain broken up. The couple first broke up on Valentine's Day 2002, after Mr. Rosado cancelled the evening's activities. The two had been dating for six weeks. 'He was a total loser,' said Kaysen of her former flame. 'He flaked on me like three times in a month.' Rosado was Kaysen's first relationship after her tumultuous breakup with Martin Brower, a design student at Pratt University, eight months earlier. Why anyone would date a male design student remains unclear."
3. Relative to our earlier post, we did some research into "Bakersfield's No. 1 Dating Site." Slap on your shit-kickers and mosey over to MyCountryMatch.com -- which, judging by the above picture, specializes in people who like to play horsey. In actuality, "The majority of our members are drawn to today's country music -- artists like Alan Jackson, Faith Hill, Martina McBride and Rascal Flatts. Country music speaks to your heart. You relate to the lyrics, you appreciate the values, and the sexuality and romance make your heart pound."
For our money, we'd rather go to the hot new singles site, It's Just Lunch -- And a Night of Bloodletting to Carpathian Forest Satanicide Death Metal. But hey, love is where you find it.
4. The Dude and John Irving, United: We're not just saying this because we have a friend who worked on the film, but "Door in the Floor" is well worth your movie dollar this weekend, if only for Jeff Bridges' brilliant, Oscar-worthy performance as a self-involved boozehound children's book author and grieving parent. (Okay, there's a couple hottt nude scenes with Kim Basinger. But it's art, you pervs.) The reviews are pretty mixed, but Fresyes gives the film a solid three raisins (out of four).
